Following on the heels of my panic over search algorithms that exclude things from me, a friend was discussing how difficult it is to talk to people “outside our geek circle” and I realized that I subconsciously do with people what the Google and Yahoo! search algorithms do to my results. I exclude some people whom I never thought to look for (Dark Side of the Moon folk) and others because some part of me believes, for whatever reason, that they will not understand me, or accept me, or entertain me, or whathaveyou.
Twitter has been a great tool for introducing me to people I would never have otherwise socialized with or sometimes even have spoken to: local business owners, people who run marathons, politicians of all stripes, professors, students, agressive loudmouths, shrinking violets, anarcho-vegans — the list goes on. It’s like a buffet of shared ideas where I can try things without committing to a whole meal. I have found music, videos, articles, and amazing photos through this kind of sampling. Of course I’ve met people too.
However, I still need to find a way to reach out socially — just as our friend mentioned — outside our geek circle. It’s easy to fall back on quoting Star Wars (or Star Trek, or Monty Python…. ) because it’s geek shorthand, we all get the reference and move on. Same with internet memes (I Can Haz Cheezburger?), viral videos, and so on. And the weather. It’s that stuff that puts us on the same page and makes us comfortable.
But, as Jessica Hagy beautifully summed up on This Is Indexed:
So, how does one stretch? Is it just a matter of practice or is there some sort of training for the mixing and mingling that happens every day? Is that what Toastmasters is all about?
It’s definitely a gap in my skill set. I can get up in front of people and talk when I am in control of the presentation and I know what I am talking about and I can argue things online because I have time to compose (and research and re-write) my arguments. I do fine with social media because it’s small bites and I can choose to walk away or ignore things. Somewhere in between all of this there is the magical forest of social interaction but I need something sturdier than a trail of breadcrumbs to follow.